Earlier I read this post by Michelle where she shared with us some of her old writing and it inspired me to show you guys (if anyone actually cares/reads this) a story which I wrote when I was about 6 or 7 that I found a few weeks ago. And guess what? IT IS A HARRY POTTER FANFICTION (#potterhead4lyf right here). It is a 6/7 year olds interpretation of the 7th HP book so as you can guess it will be absolutely awful but I will type it up for you anyway. The spelling and grammar is ridiculous but I will type it EXACTLY as it is written just because it’s funny. I’ll correct it in a different colour so it actually make sense.
So, here we go.
(Disclaimer: evidently I am NOT the wonderful J K Rowling so these character’s, setting’s and Harry Potter ‘terms’ (e.g Quidditch) do not belong to me.)
Chapter 1: Bad News.
Harry was on his way to Hogwarts. There was a bang on the door. It was Hermione and Ron. Soon they got there (and) Dumbledore called everyone for a(n) inportent (important) meeting. He said there was to be a terable (terrible) storm. After everyone went back to there dormitries (dormitories).
The next stormy morning there was a large hole in a wall. When they were ready they went to have defence against the dark arts. Later Harry and Ron found that Hermione wasn’t there. Professor Morgonagle (McGonagall – at least I tried) said a brick had fell on Hermione’s head.
“How did it fall on her head(?)” said Ron. Just then Draco Malfoy inturupted (interrupted) He said “you’ll never see (your) friend again Potter”.
It was 10 o’clock and at last the(y) found Hermione in hospital with another case of being petrefied (petrified). The next morning Ron and Harry found themself (themselves I think) lying on the hospital floor.
“Wake up Ron” said Harry. They went to the libary (library) to look for the right spell to make Hermione better. Soon they found it. It went like this.
Frozen student unfreeze, frozen student sneze (sneeze – oh God this spell is literally the worst thing ever).
But the person needs to drink something. Tearing out the page as they ran to find the nurse (I don’t even know what this sentence is supposed to say). She was busy dealing with another injurere (injury). This time she was dealing with 5 children they were Malfoy, Crab (Crabbe), Goil (Goyle), Nevel (NevILLE) Longbottom and Colin Crevely (Creevey). All with the case of being petrefied (petrified). There was (were) onley (only) 4000 children left. (My God Hogwarts is A LOT bigger than I though it was!)
Soon they found out that it was the whomping willow knocking a brick down one by one. Later Dumbledore called for another inportent (important) meeting but this time only 3094 children came (I don’t even know if this math is correct…) Something very strange was happening. (Clearly…)
Soon there was another inturuption (interruption) this time by Ron. He said “what about (the) 13 children in hospital”.
“They will stay in there until we find a spell” said Dumbledore tremblind (trembling? trembled? who knows…) with fear. “Now everyone go back to your dormitries (dormitories).”
Soon they were fast asleep asept (except) from Harry. He was thinking if he should give Dumbledore the spell. But then he thourt (thought) Dumbledore would be more happy (??????? why???????). Soon he was asleep to(o).
Chapter 2: My hero.
The next sunny damp stormy morning (what the???) there was a stranger sleeping under Harry’s bed. This person had the poition to make the 13 now became 16 children in hospital (better? and where did the other three children come from…) . The(n) quickly snatching the liquid from him and grabbing the spell, Harry dashed off to find Dumbledore.
He found Dumbledore mopeing (moping) in his office. He said “it’s getting worse”.
Harry quickly said “don’t worry” and gave him the spell and the liquid (oh how reassuring…). Then Harry left his office and hurried to find Ron. Harry whispered to a tiered (tired) Ron “I did it”.
Hermione came in still half asleep.
“Hermione” Ron and Harry said together.
“Dumbledore said the spell”.
“What about the others?” said Harry.
“They will have to go home with the rest of us”.
“Beacause (BECAUSE – BIG ELEPHANTS CAN ALWAYS USE SMALL EXITS. Did I seriously not pay attention in school back then or something??) half of the school has been knocked down already”.
So the next day everyone packed up and set off on the long journey home (what a shame!). Soon Harry arivived (arrived) at his aunt and uncles house. The next day Harry spoted (spotted) an artical (article) in the papper (paper). It said A Ministriy of Magic School has been knocked down. Harry quickly teared (tore) out the artical (article) packed his bags, found his uncles work kit and ran out the door. He caught the 10 o’clock night bus to Hogwarts.
When he got there he saw nothing asept (except) a pile of bricks (yeah because Hogwarts was TOTALLY raised to the ground by ONE whomping willow…) and a huge willow tree. Makeing (making) a pile like a small table he rote a note to his friends. They soon came to help. Soon they got tired and fell asleep on the soil.
The next sunny morning they got to work building around the willow (why??? just why?? it was the bloody whomping willow that knocked down the school in the first place – why would you build the new school AROUND it?). Hermione started carveing (carving) the trunk into stairs meanwhile Harry and Ron built the walls so high that they had to use a ladder (of course they did…). Soon it was finished but Ron Harry and Hermione paddled off in a little boat soon they found everything they needed (ok den… thought the school was finished but apparently not). Then they placed every they (thing NOT they) back niceley (nicely) and called everyone to come back to Hogwarts.
Chapter 3: New Hogwarts.
Everyone loved the new Hogwarts. It was brilliant. They went to the hall. Owl post came for everyone. Ron got a card and a new book from Wizzard World (idek). Harry got a small pot marked H.P. with a Wizzard charm with H.P. on it and inside a picture of his mum and dad (again idek what I was on about here). Hermione got a new wand like many others. Then everyone began to eat. It was late but everyone was tired (??? I made no sense back then…).
Defence against the dark arts was first in the morning. Snape said there was to be a quidetch (quidditch) match. So Harry got ready and shooted (shot) straight up in (to) the gloomy sky. Above Harry’s head futturing (fluttering) around was the golden snitch. As Harry clutched on to the snitch he sudenley (suddenly) foud (found) himself falling to the ground. Just then Malfoy pushed Harry in to the sand and Malfoy was falling to(o). Next day they were both better (ummmmm…..unrealistic or WHAT??).
Later Dumbledore called for another inportent (important) meeting )he really likes his ‘important meetings’, doesn’t he?).
“Thank you Harry for makeing (making) a new school” said Dumbledore. “73 points for Griffendore (Gryffindor) and for everyone.”
AND IT ENDS. JUST LIKE THAT.
So, clearly my writing skills back then were pretty damn awful but at least my Harry Potter knowledge was somewhat up to scratch. I mean, I surprisingly managed to spell most of the characters names right.
In case you were wondering, this is what the front cover of my book looked like:
Think of all the ink I wasted whilst colouring that in…
And this is how terrible my handwriting was way back then:
So re-reading my first ever Harry potter fanfic has been…amusing to say the least. I think we have all now established that I have been a Potterhead for a very long time now
and that I was and probably still am really quite a strange child and had probably the oddest childhood ever.
Anyway, I hope you enjoyed something a bit different. I tired to take a good photo of my neighbors tree that I used to think was a whomping willow but I felt slightly awkward trying to inconspicuously take a photo of their garden so the featured photo is just other random trees, sorry!
Thanks for reading.